Ten steps to mlm hit - network-marketing
First, here's my tip of the day: There are proverbs carved on the bellies of those statues on Easter Island. And one of 'em is: He who laughs at your dense jokes is up to no good. (Remember that next time you go on a date. )
Now for the story: Markel didn't want me to be left out of his most recent argument floor affair opening - amazing called Scamway - that's been about since the serpent in Mel Gibson's movie conned Eve.
So we showed up at Denny's restaurant where a room full of glassy-eyed goofballs were pretending to be sharp commerce people. It reminded me of an added Easter Island impression that says "Being doted on by a crowd of bothersome scamsters is not a good thing. " That's when I asked Markel if this was some kind of weird used-car salesmen cult. The whole room roared with laughter evoking eerie imagery of ugly statues.
The Chief Scamster arose to click his power point presentation about the time my Tex-Mex Chicken-in-a-Bagel Skillet arrived. Already Scamway came along, this guy said he lived on the edge of economic failure in a roach-infested preview park. Now he lives in a 39-room, 4,000 balance foot home on a lake. Geez, I thought, I admiration if that's the same apartment building construction where Uncle Afred lives?
All you need do is register eight more people, he said while flailing his arms with help-I'm-being-attacked-by-a-swarm-of-wasps enthusiasm. "If you register eight ancestors this week who put your name down eight citizens who join up eight people, in eleven short weeks all 6. 4 billion inhabitants of the earth will be in your down line together with Madonna and an extra 2 billion from some indefinite galaxy. "
How could I refuse?
$29. 95 buys my own business. "That's less than a McDonald franchise," he added.
For that I get the privilege to annoy my contacts with a file full of Baptist-slash-Mormon looking models using over-priced detergent, vitamins and blusher in concentrate. And it comes in a attractive binder.
"Any questions?" he asked.
"There are no brainless questions," he added. (He's never met Uncle Alfred. )
I like a challenge. So I asked, "If chickens don't have noses, where do they keep their boogers?"
The woman diagonally the table, named Hannibal-Lector-in-a-Dress, nodded. "Good question," she said, "I've continually wondered that myself. "
"And what if I buy this stuff and find out its crap?"
The group chuckled at my naiveté.
"I cut my arm off a year ago and took some of these here vitamins," one guy testified. "And whaddaya know?! My arm grew back. Hairs and all. "
Chief Scamster then told how to make the big bucks roll in.
First, be your own best customer. Dumping all your cleaning supplies, laundry detergent and eye shadow in the trash and replacing them with overpriced concentrate is a sure sign of monetary genius, he explained. What's more, it's critical to deem in your product.
Second, make a list of each one you want to annoy. This includes friends, family, coworkers and each one in the white pages from the three adjacent towns.
Third, analytically annoy each on your list. Ask them out to ceremonial dinner where they, too, can be absorbed in a crowd of glassy-eyed, goofy-looking scamsters.
Fourth, act giddy. Phony enthusiasm is a proven sales gimmick, above all when coupled with idiotic effect testimonials.
Fifth, give emphasis to the sensation ability by pointing out the vast add up to of gullible associates who think they are all destined to be pyramid millionaires.
Sixth, ask your links if they would like to quit their jobs and work part time for a six-figure income. (Don't tell them that four of the six digits are to the right of the decimal. )
Seventh, never use words like "multi-level marketing" as a big cheese may get the idea that your multi-level marketing design is a multi-level marketing scheme.
Eighth, assignment the image of accomplishment by export a new Lexus. In receipt of in debt up to your flat eyeballs is a tried-and-proven sales strategy.
Ninth, just think of all the stuff you can take from your pay packet taxes, like one eighth of your bedroom if you use the back into a corner for a home-office. Yes sir, you can pave your road to materials by killing long hours for a tiny tax deduction.
Tenth, stay motivated by homicide an obscene sum of money on motivational tapes and CDs. Someday, when you hit the big time, you, too, can screw your down line out of thousands of dollars.
Next week. How to retire early exchange game of chance tickets.
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